The Funny Things Thread!

[NozomiStar]

the "OMG it spins" one had me in bits my OH was looking at me like a nutter.

[tazzyface]

I have sooo many photos saved that I find hilarious. Of course, I have a terrible sense of humour so I doubt anyone would enjoy them






This one just cracks me up and I don't know why.

[absolutebrutal]

[MrsEss]

[NozomiStar]

i want these pants!!!

[MrsEss]

I Love Blackadder


Blackadder: Baldrick, where's the manuscript?

Baldrick: You mean the big papery thing tied up with string?

EB: Yes, Baldrick, the manuscript...belonging to Dr Johnson.

B: You mean the big baity fellow in a black cape who just left?

EB: Yes, Baldrick, Doctor Johnson.

B: So...you're asking where the big papery thing tied up with string belonging to the big baity fellow in a black cape who just left is?

EB: Yes, Baldrick, I am. And if you don't answer, then the booted bony thing with five toes at the end of my leg will soon connect sharply with the soft dangly collection of objects in your trousers. For the last time, Baldrick, where is Doctor Johnson's manuscript?

B: On the fire.

EB: On the WHAT?!!

B: The hot orangy thing below the stony mantlepiece.

[ScarletLady]

LMAO at baldrick!!

and the cats growing on trees actually made me Laugh Out Loud...

don't know why id din't look at this earlier - may have helped my hysterical breakdown

[Miss Liberty]

[MrsEss]

awww, pool baby is cute!









UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
Contestant: Homosexuals.
Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester.

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
White: I'll give you some clues. What do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm.
White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're . .?
Contestant: Strong.
White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis.
White: Well, there we are then. So, who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?


CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)
Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?
Caller: Japan.
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller: Er . . . Mexico?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)
Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.

DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant: Holland?
Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?
Contestant: No.

THE VAULT (ITV)
Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
Contestant: Nostalgia.

STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (RADIO 2)
Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?
Contestant: Jesus

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Eamonn Holmes: Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing what?
Contestant: Basketball.

DOG EAT DOG (BBC1)
Ulrika Jonsson: Who wrote Lord Of The Rings?
Contestant: Enid Blyton.

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Eamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid, liquid and . ?
Contestant: Jelly.

FORT BOYARD (CHALLENGE TV)
Jodie Penfold: Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word - CHED and PIT.
Team: Chedpit.

SIMPLY THE BEST (ITV)
Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held?
Contestant: Six.
Tufnell: Higher!
Contestant: Five..

NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM)
Jeff Owen: In which country is Mount Everest?
Contestant (long pause): Er, it's not in Scotland, is it?

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson: In traffic, what 'j' is where two roads meet?
Contestant: Jool carriageway?

JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
Contestant: Well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth. . . er . . . Three?

[CherryLex]

Ahahaha, these are all great! I officially <3 this thread!

[ScarletLady]

lulz @ fear and loathing cats

[ClaireCalavera]

Omg I haven't laughed this hard in ages - THANK YOU!! King of Threads indeed

randoms -





















lolcatz -













for the rat fans -

[MrsEss]

Claire - yours made me laugh sooo much people want to know what i'm looking at!!

*i've noticed there are alot on eeryones post involving cats*

[~*Zombie Candycane~*]

LMFAO to all of the above! the rat ones are amazing! <3 Rats

[NozomiStar]

yay for ratz


i think this one will fit in around here.

[~*Zombie Candycane~*]

LMMFAO! i LOVE THAT EYEBROW DOG!

[ClaireCalavera]

*is proud of her choice of funnies* lol ratties ftw!

lol!!! The eyebrow dog is so cute!!

[ScarletLady]

hover cat made me spray tea through my nose

(i was laughing btw not under it's scary influence )

[NozomiStar]

hover cat made me spray tea through my nose

(i was laughing btw not under it's scary influence )

ahaha thats just funny!!

[CherryLex]

Oh mah gawd I've got a case of the giggles!
I love the ratties!

[Recovery_One]

I found this to be rather amusing, this is actually my friend Phil, hes a really lovely, but incredibly hairy! Plus he does alot of cycling, he lurves his bike so he has to be er aerodynamic lol, and he often waxes his chest..... and here he is halfway through hehe!

[Rhaeniel]

OMG, I nearly peed reading this thread... no seriously, I ACTUALLY nearly peed!

I love eyebrow dog!

[ScarletLady]

OMG, I nearly peed reading this thread... no seriously, I ACTUALLY nearly peed!

I love eyebrow dog!

bloody pregnant women...nearly peeing all over the place

sorry only joking

[MrsEss]

i'm sure i replied to this? hmmmmmm. oh well!!

MOAR:
(these are true things said in court )

> ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the
> moment of the impact?
> WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter
> has ever been involved in voodoo?
> WITNESS: We both do.
> ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
> WITNESS: We do.
> ATTORNEY: You do?
> WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
>
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true
> that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know
> about it until the next morning?
> WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar
> exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the
> twenty-year-old, how old is he?
> WITNESS: He's twenty, much like
> your IQ.

ATTORNEY: She had three children,
> right?
> WITNESS: Yes.
> ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
> WITNESS: None.
> ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
> WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a
> different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

> ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your
> autopsies have you performed on dead people?
> WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put
> up too much of a fight.

[Phoenix]

Zelda fans (or non zelda fans): http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Torg4VAtUhc

Laugh, cry or cringe