Need advice about being 16 XD

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SuperCollider
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Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by SuperCollider » Wed Sep 24, 2008 6:49 pm

Good to see the board back (y)

Right so, Im 16... 16 and a half actually...
And my problem is that my mum is still treating me like a child.
She wont let me out at night, she wont let me stay at peoples houses etc

So earlier tonight I asked 'Would you mind if I stayed at my mate Dom's house?'
And she flipped at me and had a right go, saying that just because I was 16 doesnt mean that I can do what I like

She wont even let me get piercings ¬_¬
I dont see how any of this is in her control to stop me... but tbh I don't want to go against her word because she probably would chuck me out or something lol

Addvviicee needed on how to like, proove to her that she cant control me like this XD

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by ANNloses » Wed Sep 24, 2008 6:55 pm

First of all, most piercing regulations state that you will need parental consent in order to get pierced when you are underage. If you really want a piercing that badly, I'm sure it would be well worth the wait.

I'm going to be quite honest, your mom isn't that controlling at all. You want to prove that she doesn't have the right to control you. Well, she does. She's your mother, your legal guardian, and she is the one who is liable for you if anything goes wrong, until the day that you turn eighteen. There are reasons why some parents are more protective than others. I agree with some of them, to be honest. Say you went and got a piercing, and it ended up getting infected. You'd run the risk of serious infection throughout your body, and your mom would have to see you through the treatment, and she would have to have her insurance cover it. Not to mention all the worry that would put her through.

I think that one day you'll appreciate your mom a little more, and see that her concern is simply that, and not an act of control. You'll see that she does care about you and is only concerned about your safety.

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by SuperCollider » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:00 pm

In could get a piercing without her consent...
She controls alot more like she wont tell me my bank details and wont let me get a job, she wouldnt even let me to go the college I wanted until I said if she wouldnt let me go then I would drop out of school which... but I didnt bother mentioning any of that because its irrelevant...

Everyone here thinks my mums right? I shouldnt be allowed to stay at a friends till Im 18? :|

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by <<Miss_Sami>> » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:16 pm

When I was 16 I was allowed to stop over at my friends house/s, but I'd known them for a long time and my mum knew their mums so she knew we wouldn't get up to anything! (eg. That their mums wouldn't give us all loads of alcohol)
Does you mum know your friends parents?

It's hard to comment without knowing all of the details, but I can only assume that your mum is only doing what she thinks is best for you!
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by SuperCollider » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:21 pm

She doesn't know his mum, and hes a proper good friend of mine.... known him for about 3 years now i thiiinnkkk
Hes having a really crap time with stuff and he keeps asking me to go over but I have to say no and then I feel mean =/
Its in a really odd place aswell so theres only like 3 buses a day so its not even like I could just pop over for a bit...

But I spose it actually is useless asking here for advice because you havent realyl got the whole picture :roll:

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by absolutebrutal » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:25 pm

i tend to agree with ANNloses, tbh. at the age of 16 you're bound to clash with your mother over things, most of us do. parents will only try and protect you, whether or not their ways are too much or too little varies, but ultimately, she is just trying to protect you.

have you tried building up her trust in you? my brother just turned 17 and he more or less comes and goes as he pleases... but my dad and step-mother trust him completely. he's always respected their rules and over time the rules have relaxed. and when he HAS done something they wouldn't want/allow he's had to start from scratch and work with them to gain the privileges he has now.


may i ask if your friend is male or female? this may have a lot to do with it.
what does she think you're likely to be up to when you're out all night with a mate (either gender)?

as for the piercing thing... if you go ahead and get one despite her asking you not to, her 'control' will only become worse, as you'll have proven theres no reason for her to trust you. sometimes parents will put their foot down about body modification because they don't have all the info, and they tend to worry about infection or the way others will treat/view you etc... maybe it is a little controlling but it is very likely she just wants what's best for you. before you go off and get one anyway i'd try and discuss it with her first.
i talked to my mother about my choices of piercings and tattoos and she went from "oh i don't think you should be doing that!" to "if you think it's right for you then i'm okay with it". IF i had gone off and done it secretly then come home and showed her, i'd probably be dead :lol:

plus a lot of mothers still see their children as just that, children, even at 16! hell, my aunt is still in shock that i'm 22! even when you turn 18 she'll still try and do what she believes is best for you.
if you feel it's TOO MUCH then sit her down and thrash out a compromise (not literally of course!) and stick by the compromise until she has enough security and trust in you to bend a little.
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by absolutebrutal » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:27 pm

SuperCollider wrote:She doesn't know his mum, and hes a proper good friend of mine.... known him for about 3 years now i thiiinnkkk
Hes having a really crap time with stuff and he keeps asking me to go over but I have to say no and then I feel mean =/
Its in a really odd place aswell so theres only like 3 buses a day so its not even like I could just pop over for a bit...

But I spose it actually is useless asking here for advice because you havent realyl got the whole picture :roll:

ah i just read this. it's a boy mate. this could be where the problem lies, unless you're a boy too? (apologies if you are, i assumed you're female due to the majority being so here).
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by kezerb » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:28 pm

Where do you live?
In the UK at 16 you don't need parents permission to get piercings, however I do suggest you DON'T get one as your mother might kick you out :/

EDIT: Just read the last of your post saying she will probs kick you out haha

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by iamtheparty » Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:39 pm

I wouldn't have been allowed to stay over at a male friend's house at the age of 16. In fact, I was still having a 10:30 bedtime on school days. The fact is, you are young. And you do still need the guidance of a parent, even if it doesn't feel that way. I feel awful now for the strops I threw at my mother when I was a teenager. But I'm sure she did the same thing to her mother and so on and so forth.

As for the bank details thing, since you don't have a job I'm assuming it's her money in there? In which case I think it's perfectly reasonable for her to have control over that.

The only advice I can give is to live by her rules for now and give in over the little stuff and she'll respect you more and let you have a say in the bigger stuff. Like the college. What are her reasons for not wanting you to go to that college? And what are your reasons for wanting to go there?
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by Haylum » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:08 pm

iamtheparty wrote: As for the bank details thing, since you don't have a job I'm assuming it's her money in there? In which case I think it's perfectly reasonable for her to have control over that.
Unless she's claiming EMA, in which case the money is her reward for going to college and is 100% hers. I think the bank account thing is a bit harsh, but if the account is in her name then I'm afraid there's nothing you can do. You could always open your own bank account and take responsibility for any future money you earn/are given.
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by deadteddys » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:08 pm

Your mum sounds just like my mum.
Im 19, I go to university, and you'll never guess what, I have a curfew of about 11.30pm.
Shes not so strick about me staying over people houses, but she doesnt like anyone in the house, or staying over, if she's there.
On the piercings front, I begged and begged and begged, and in the end she gave in. Now I just get them without asking her (because legally I can do as I please). I now have 22, and two tattoos. She knows about most of the piercings but she doesnt know about the tattoos because I respect her wishes that much to keep them hidden (She hates tattoos on girls, doesnt mind them on boys).
Its all about a balance really, give her a reason to trust you, and she might be more leanient (sp?).
Im not sure about the whole bank account/job/college thing, maybe she doesnt like the fact your growing up? I dunno.
Maybe you'll just have to wait until you move out. Thats what im looking forward to, 3 years and i'll be on my own :)

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by Phoenix » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:11 pm

SuperCollider wrote: But I spose it actually is useless asking here for advice because you havent realyl got the whole picture :roll:
Then why did you ask in the first place?

Look at it from your mums side of things, she obviously cares alot about you and is only trying to do what she thinks is best for you. You're probably forgetting that you are only 16 and in the eyes of her and the law you're still a child. Trust me, I've been fighting the same battle you are since I was 10.

The worst thing you could do is go behind her back because if she finds out you will be in so much trouble. Nearly all mums are like this: I'm 18 in a few months and I'm not allowed any facial piercings, I'm not allowed to sleep in the same room as my boyfriend, I'm not allowed to get a bus home at night.

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by absolutebrutal » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:18 pm

also - it is quite frustrating when girls complain about their mothers because they're not allowed to do certain things, when it's clear a mothers intention is to protect and guide (even if it is a little extreme).

as somebody who has a 100% broken relationship with my mother, i can honestly that maybe you should be a little more grateful that she cares enough to say no to things? the only thing i got into conflict about were my tattoos, like i said, and this was only because my mother going through a phase. once i'd spoken to her about it she changed her mind and went back to not really giving a crap what i did.

i'm sure the sound of unlimited freedom and a mother who doesn't get on your case is appealing to a 16 year old, especially as you're at an age where you'll be trying to discover more about yourself. but believe me... you've not got it as bad as you believe.
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by ANNloses » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:35 pm

as for the piercing thing... if you go ahead and get one despite her asking you not to, her 'control' will only become worse, as you'll have proven theres no reason for her to trust you. sometimes parents will put their foot down about body modification because they don't have all the info, and they tend to worry about infection or the way others will treat/view you etc... maybe it is a little controlling but it is very likely she just wants what's best for you. before you go off and get one anyway i'd try and discuss it with her first.
i talked to my mother about my choices of piercings and tattoos and she went from "oh i don't think you should be doing that!" to "if you think it's right for you then i'm okay with it". IF i had gone off and done it secretly then come home and showed her, i'd probably be dead
I agree 100%.
When I was FIFTEEN years old, I was rebellious as hell and went out and got a septum piercing without my parents' consent. (In Hawaii, there are no laws regarding piercings whatsoever. Terrible!) I thought, "Hey, this is my body, I can do whatever the hell I want with it."
WRONG.
I came home with a huge CBB hanging out of my nose, and shit hit the fan. It was some of the worst trouble I had ever been in. At the time I thought my parents were being really annoying and just causing trouble for me. But now that I look back on it, they were just upset that our trust had been broken, and I had gone against their wishes and behind their backs to get something that they had already made clear that they didn't want me getting until I was responsible for myself at the age of eighteen.
Now I keep my septum flipped up and rarely wear it down. I don't wear it in front of my parents because I don't want to upset them, and I respect their wishes not to see it. Now I realize that getting it done at fifteen was a stupid decision. I still love the piercing, and I am almost eighteen. I would have been able to wait that long to get it pierced. Plus, if you put the extra years of thought and consideration into a piercing or tattoo design, the less likely you are to not want it when you finally get it done. More commitment, you know?

You should really give us more details, because that way we could maybe help you further. From what it seems you just seem like any other teenage girl who doesn't get along with her mom- and I say this from tons and tons of experience. :lol:

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by ANNloses » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:39 pm

absolutebrutal wrote:also - it is quite frustrating when girls complain about their mothers because they're not allowed to do certain things, when it's clear a mothers intention is to protect and guide (even if it is a little extreme).

as somebody who has a 100% broken relationship with my mother, i can honestly that maybe you should be a little more grateful that she cares enough to say no to things? the only thing i got into conflict about were my tattoos, like i said, and this was only because my mother going through a phase. once i'd spoken to her about it she changed her mind and went back to not really giving a crap what i did.

i'm sure the sound of unlimited freedom and a mother who doesn't get on your case is appealing to a 16 year old, especially as you're at an age where you'll be trying to discover more about yourself. but believe me... you've not got it as bad as you believe.
I agree with you again here!
When I was young and hung out with other kids who got into a lot of trouble, they'd ask me why I had to be home at a certain time. They'd ask me why I had to follow this and that when it came to rules that my parents had set up for me. They had no rules. Their parents didn't care what they did to their bodies. I was SO jealous at the time, and I even tried to throw that at my parents when we'd get into fights. Haha, that just made me look so stupid, in retrospect.
I was so lucky to have parents who cared enough to give me a set of rules. It shows that they are enforcing values and discipline, which every child needs to be taught in order to become a fine individual later on. I now pity those friends I had, who are all in crappy situations now (families torn apart, living on the streets, got arrested), and it's clear as to why they are in such predicaments.

In the end I think that the OP might need to just step back, gain some perspective, and realize that her mom has her best interest at heart. :)

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by SuperCollider » Wed Sep 24, 2008 8:56 pm

Wow theres a lot to reply too...
I have tried the trust thing, and it worked a bit for only about a week, which was a good week tbh lol, im not a boy XD hes got a gf, and im pretty good mates with her too so its all good

Banks all mine =] all my money, ive got about £900 in there at the moment... and im getting another £180 in there in november from EMA back dates, but Im not allwoed to get it...

I wanted to go to the different c ollege because my public school was really terrible... the teachers were dealers and what not, so i wanted to go to the other one near me but she said she didnt want me to go because she didnt like my friends

Ive always thought she had an issue with me growing up, im her youngest daughter etc and my big sister moved out a couple of weeks ago which has got her all a bit weird

Phoenix, I thought I might get a more kinda 16 year old point of view answer... thats why I asked... Bus things same for me aswell lol

More detail.... hmm she tried stopping me going out because she thought I might get into contact with my dad, and i was grounded for 7 months when I was 15 because I went to a town that she had told me not too because she didnt like my friends, I used to have a kurfue of 5.30 but that has changed now because of college Im not allowed to talk to my nan [her mum] because my mum doesnt trust her

Most of you seem to be saying the same thing, like build up trust with her and things like that but I find it proper impossible because she doesnt give me any situations that could help build up that trust :| If I share a tiny amount of my day with her like say 'omg guess what happend today' kind of thing she will think its completely outrageous and have a go for it

I just get the feeling that I really can't win

[Sorry for the uber long post]

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by LittlePinkFaery » Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:11 pm

You are legally a child and therefore under your mothers control until the age of 18- like it or not it is a fact.

I totally understand you want more freedom to live your life, but believe me there is plenty of time.

How about having your friend stay over? would she allow that? What if he slept on the sofa and not in your room?

At risk of sounding condescending-and an old codger, you will look back and see how much of a child you still were at 16 even though you feel an adult now. But hell you won't listen to me, I wouldn't have listened to me if someone said it to me when I 16! LOL!

Play nice with her, talk to her, ask of you can have friends to stay instead- maybe if she starts to trust them things will change :)

As for piecing- I thought you still needed permission at 16- but I don't really know- all I can say is I would rather a daughter of mine be pierced than tattooed- at least they can be removed ( I waited till I was 30 for my first tattoo so I was really sure!)

good luck with the mother/daughter negotiations!

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by Vicsarina » Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:13 pm

I know you don't want to hear this, but I'm glad that your mother keeps tight reigns on you.

I've seen so many 13-16 yo's out at raves taking things like coke and getting messed up. It's terrible. The group I know go from York to Leeds every month. And all they do is tell their parents they're 'At a friend's'.

Unlimited freedom is a bad thing for someone at those ages. You're still learning boundaries.

And this friend, Dom? Why doesn't his girlfriend go over to his instead of you? Why must it be you? It sounds awfully strange.
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by kezerb » Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:19 pm

How about advice from a 17 year old?
Seriously it's not worth arguing about, I wish I had a protective mum like that sometimes.
Anyway wait until your 18 because at the end of the day she's the one paying for your food, housing and doing you washing and cooking :lol:
Then when your 18 and hopefully have a good education under your belt (I'm allllll about education ain't I?!) you can get a job and do what the hell you like but if you disobey her and break her trust she is less likely to lend you money when you've gone and spent all your wages to pay for your flat in the pub by 'accident'

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by iamtheparty » Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:34 pm

It might be worth talking to your sister. I'm sure she went through this when she was your age. She might have tips for getting along with your mum and maybe she could even have a word with her about letting you have more freedom.

Does your mum let you have any access to your EMA?
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by Moody108 » Wed Sep 24, 2008 11:02 pm

she does sound over protective but you sound mature by not wanting to defy her. keeping in her good books is the best way to earn trust and respect, i rebelled a LOT when i was 14-17, i'm talking piercings, tattoos, drugs, getting drunk and throwing up in the house,staying out all night, not coming back for days, bunking off school, arguments, smoking, underage sex. when i look back i think "i was such a brat"! it does get better, if you're the eldest child she's bound to find it difficult to let go of you being a child. some people on this board are old and appear to look down on the younger people because of age, you seem mature though so try giving your mum the phone number and address of where you're staying and asking in advance, maybe get the friend to meet her so she knows who your staying with?

good luck :)
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by Criss » Wed Sep 24, 2008 11:28 pm

I am sorry but i feel the need to point out the obvious.

You are 16, female and want to spend the night at a young boys house, as a sleep over. Quite honestly this is not something many mom's or parents in general would accept or allow, if he has a girl friend and is having issues why doesn's she spend the night with him to comfort him? Why you? (When I was 16 I was allowed to spend the night at my best friends house who happened to be a guy, although he was VERY gay, and I had him over to meet my dad many many times before asking. One of the rules was that there had to be other girls there as well, we could not be alone.)

When I was 14 I wanted a tongue piecing very badly, I spent MONTH researching. I researched horror stories, care, everything. I put together a presentation, and tried to convince my dad that I had everything covered, and all the what-ifs. He told me No. When I was 16 I tried again, I had been working full time, and homeschooling myself and kept my grades up. I knew that legally I could get it done on my own. He still declined, I waited until i was 19 to finally get it done. It was worth the wait and my dad accepted it and knew that it was something I put lots of though and effort into.

You cant fault your mom when she is upset with you, when you disobey her wishes and do things she has asked you to not do. (Hanging out with "bad" people, going to different towns, etc.) Also I can see where she is coming from about not giving you access to the bank account. You would be surprised how fast money can be wasted on junk, especially when your young. I am sure she has a reason for keeping you out of the account, and im sure she has given you a date/time/reason for the money. (example: When your 18, when you 21, its for school, for your future house, etc.)

At 16 you are still a teen, teens make "stupid" choices. Your mom is trying to protect you, and save you from pain and discomfort. You said you where 16 and a half which means you are only a year and half away from being 18. I would say wait patiently, the time will fly by especially if you busy yourself. When you have your own place, job and are supporting yourself you can do whatever you want, but for now respect her wishes. And be thankful, because a mom who cares to much is better then a mom who doesn't care at all.

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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by moROSE69 » Thu Sep 25, 2008 12:07 am

Parents say it alot "My roof my rules". I am the oldest child and I moved out at 20. My parents kind of shoved me out. I was given the option to pay rent or leave because I was getting out of hand. Looking back I was really angry. I stayed away from my house for days at my boyfriend place and was doing drugs and drinking alot. I was being really irresponsible and not setting a good example for my sisters. I didn't want to leave my boyfriend or ruin our relationship. I knew staying home would do that. They tried to be lenient and gave me a 4 am curfew. I was just unreasonable. I just wanted to do whatever I wanted.

As for stay at your friends house you should let your mom meet his family and your friend at their place and let her see what environment of their houseold is. If she feels comfortable maybe you can hang out there ONLY when his parents are there. I can see why she would say no. She is just worried about you. Mom's are such worry warts. I doubt she would ever let you spend the night there. If I was your mother I wouldn't. It's just not prudent and sends a bad message. I may sound hypocritical but I see how stupid I was when I was a teenager. Going out drinking and ending up at strange places or peoples houses I've never met before. I got in all kinds of trouble... and that is what every parent is scared of. They don't want a call from the police saying you are arrested or even dead. If I was a mother I would probably act the same way my parent's did. I hope I never have a daughter lol. Raising a child is so hard these days! I commend any of you parents on this forum. It takes serious chops. She may seem overbearing and overprotective but she is your mother and doesn't want anything to happen to you or see you get in any trouble. You could also see if he could come by your place if your mother is home.

I thought the same thing when I was your age about tattoos and piercings. I was so pissed when my mom found out I was going to get my tongue pierced when I was only 15 and stopped me from going. I should thank her cause I wasn't going to get it professionally done since I need her permission I was getting a friend of a friend I had never met to do it. Teenagers are so stupid... sorry to offend anyone but when you get older you will see. I admit to being stupid too. They all want to rebel and make horrible decisions. I pierced my own nose twice and attempted my belly button but it was crooked. I also got into a little scarification which was stupid of me too. I didn't know what I was doing! I could have really messed myself up. Alot of people said this and I agree... if you get a piercing or tattoo your mother won't trust you. You would have done it behind her back and that will offend, disrespect, and upset her. Then you really won't be able to do anything. Trust takes a long time to build. You need to take baby steps and once you have proven you are responsible she will give you more freedom... just don't take it and run with cause then you are grounded and back to square one.

As for your money and college. Well I think she might be overdoing it there but she wants you to be responsible with your money. As for college... is she paying? I could understand why she would not let you go. If it was excessive tuition or distance or she felt you wouldn't study or work hard then she has every right to say no since it would be her money. Also she would be accountable for any loans and such. College is a huge investment. You have to be serious.

As for not letting you have a job I can't understand that. I will agree with you on that unless you want to be a stripper or something lol. A job is one of the first real world experiences a young person can have. You will learn how to manage money and work ethics. It will certainly not look good either if you graduate college and have no work experience. I think you should push to get a job. What kind of place would you want to work at?

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snapaxle
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by snapaxle » Thu Sep 25, 2008 2:36 am

Oh man... when I was 16, my parents were even more controlling than your mother. I wasn't even allowed to stay over at female friends' houses unless it was the daughter of a family my parents had known for years (and being that my parents are workaholics and don't go out much, that list was very small). I had to get a job as soon as I could drive myself, and my parents gave me a curfew of 8 pm, even though my second soccer practice wasn't over until 8:30 pm and I still had to drive home =P Hahaha.

I begged for YEARS to get a second ear piercing and my parents wouldn't let me. Aside from things like that, I was not allowed to keep my bedroom door shut, much less locked, and was told repeatedly that if I did, the door would be taken off the hinges. When I got my car and started driving to work (at 4:30 am!) my parents disabled the sound system in the car for almost a month so I "wouldn't get distracted," even though I paid for half of the cost of the car and all of my own gas. And if I had a quarter tank or less, they would let the air out of my tires so I couldn't drive because it was "too dangerous to risk getting stranded with no gas."

All that aside, you kind of answered your own question there at the end. How is it in her control? She doesn't have to pay for you, and if you are doing things she asks you not to, she won't. I don't know what the laws are in the UK on that, but from what you and the other UKers here have said, it sounds like she can do that any time she pleases...

To finish off this maaassiiiive post, I'm just going to say that I am glad now, three years after moving out of my parents' house, that I am glad they were so "crazy" and "controlling." There were way too many temptations that I would have ended up jumping into had they not been there giving me crap =P Four girls in my graduating class from high school now have kids... and, surprise surprise, none of them have parents who are actively involved in their lives. It sucks now, but in the long run it's for the better =]

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Bunny
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Re: Need advice about being 16 XD

Post by Bunny » Thu Sep 25, 2008 5:03 am

Im 15, I am allowed into the city with a responsible friend for the day just us, and then get home by around 5 when it gets dark. My parents have no problem with me going to my friends houses after dark, just so long as mom, dad or one of our security people gets to drop me off or walk me to their house (and so long as my parents trust them).Im allowed to go round to my guy-friends houses during the day , but not at night. And my mom is still petrified about them going up to my bed room with me (Which I find ridiculous).

My mom knows I would never go out to get drunk because there are a few members of my family that are alcoholics and seeing them has scared me for life about drinking. So I go no where near it even if my other friends are getting pissed.I wouldn't do drugs because I like my brain cells , and I wouldn't smoke because I already have problems with my throat ad if I did it would probably kill me. XD

My parents wont let my get piercings ... so of course I did the whole hey lets self pierce thing when I was 13 and I had my lip, Monroe, septum and numerous ear piercings all in. But never wore them at home :lol: . In the end I realized I was just doing it because I wasn't allowed it so I have taken them all out and thankfully theres only like 1 mark left from my lip piercing but you can only tell if you know about it :D . And I now after 3 years of thought im thinking I will go and get my monroe done professionally. I have talked this over with my mom and shes going to go with me when I go :i2: . although shes all petrified about her "baby's skin being wreaked"

To be honest just take everything step by step and talk everything over as you go. Thats what Im doing. And tell the truth because if you lie about doing something eventually the truth comes out and thats normally worse .... Probably get a job because that will show her that your responsible . (I have 1 but I also internship with 2 major NZ fashion houses which takes up some time atm :mrgreen: ). And then maybe set some things like You can go to this persons house for this amount of time and be back by blah blah and if you stick to what you said you were going to do eventually she will widen your leash :).(make sense?)

Hopefully that helped XD eep.

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